Not. Happy.

I haven't been this depressed since like. Last year. And that was when I was with someone. Its not your usual "being depressed".
Its that kinda depression when you see someone you really care about sad and depressed it just kills you. And I mean it.

I don't know. If you know what I mean. It doesn't matter anyway. Its just. A very. Painful feeling. But then again. Its my fault anyway.

Have you ever had that feeling where. You had to do something that you didn't one because you we're thinking of the future? How you know you would fuck something up really bad and you didn't want that to happen? And you had to do something about it.

Even though if it killed you to do it.

Well. It doesn't matter.

Not anymore.